February 2009
34 posts
My sister-in-law is out of town on vacation, leaving my brother in charge of taking care of their three kids. I received the following email this morning:
Hypothesis: If not fed until after 9am, my children will not totally lose their shit Procedure: Put cartoons on to keep subjects happy. Sleep in. Data: Shit-losing confirmed in 100% of subjects Conclusion: Hypothesis failed
Speaking from...
January 2009
80 posts
A Reminder Email I Just Sent Myself:
“Remember to buy Groundhog Day so that you can watch it on Monday.”
I need more friends.
Top Chef's Jeff: 'The Show Used Me as a Sex... →
The fact that this statement was said with complete sincerity is hilarious to me. But I give him props for saying that he enjoyed being used as a sex object. It at least shows that he has a sense of humor about himself, if not an inflated view of himself.
Alaska Volcano Ready to Blow →
Mount Redoubt last erupted when I was 5 years old and, as I recall, caused a lot of problems in Anchorage and much of the Kenai Peninsula.
Mount Spurr erupted in 1992 and completely blanketed Anchorage in ash. I remember riding my bike around my neighborhood and basically being in the middle of a grey snowstorm. Come to think of it, why was I riding around my neighborhood during an ashfall? Where...
“If they’re gonna give me monkey ass filled with fried banana, I’ll...”
– Fabio, Top Chef
He never fails to provide the best quote of any given episode. I still haven’t gotten over the “Is Top Chef, Not Top Scallop” comment, which became a mini-meme before the episode even aired.
Notes on Tumbling
I’ve been pretty disappointed with my blog lately. When I created a Tumblr account, I had no idea that, along with the ease of posting videos and links as well as text posts, I was also signing up for an almost cult-like online community consisting of followers, reblogs, likes, and most recently, “crushes.”
While I think it’s a good community as a whole, and I like being a...
Metropolitan Mondays (On Wednesday) - Did I Ask... →
In an effort to share with everyone my favorite thing about Mondays - the New York Times Metropolitan Diary - I’ve started a feature: Metropolitan Mondays. I’ll post my favorite diary entry from that day every week. Click here for last week’s diary.
To fully capture the essence of this feature, I encourage you to read these entries as I do, with a faux-British accent.
Dear Diary:
My godfather...
Big Yellow Joint (from Arrested Development)
I...
“He’s like Hugh Hefner, only more rape-y.”
– Jason Sudeikis, referring to Joe Francis, in 2 Square at the UCB
WatchThose 5 special people that responded to “Name Something that Goes Up” are my kind of people.
(via Best Week Ever)
Even Further Evidence That My Life is a TV Show
I received the following email from one of my roommates this morning:
Hello Gals, Happy Monday! I just wanted to give you all a heads up that a very special friend of mine Tim, and his magazine, “Corduroy,” will be using our apartment from 1-3pm on Tuesday for a photo shoot with Rory Culkin, (Macaulay Culkin’s younger brother). I will be styling and doing make up. Katie, if you...
WatchPhysics and movies comin’ together.
Excellent movie, by the way.
What does it say about me that the only person to...
Probably best not to answer that.
WatchNYC Baker sells “Drunken Negro Head” cookies.
Wow. There’s really no other word that I can say right now. Just… wow.
(via Best Week Ever)
“Treat the stage with respect. Treat it with total and complete reverence. The...”
– Amy Poehler
(via improvoker, article by matt stillman, via rubysneakers)
As a person who has always been pretty shy, I never thought that I would like improv. I’ve never had a desire to be on stage or be in the spotlight - the idea that you act in front of people without any lines was, if...
Watchpaulscheer:
WATCH THE HIGH FIVE INAUGURARTION
HIGH FIVES: Joe Scarborough, Mika Brzezinski, Pat Buchanan, Larry King, Senator Mike Gravel, Ron Bonjean, Raven-Simone, Arianna Huffington, Peggy Noonan, Tucker Carlson, Paul Begala, Darrell from DMC, Sarah Silverman, Governor Howard Dean, Common, Soledad O’Brien, Jack Black, Mark Halperin, Representative Harold Ford, Governor Brian Schweitzer of...
'Sex and the City' Stars Commit to Sequel →
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
It's just like 'Drumline'!
Obamamania Hasn't Reached Wyoming →
There are people in this country who don’t support Obama?! [Gasp!] Blasphemy, I say!
I thought the economy was supposed to be fixed as...
I have to say I’m a little disappointed.
“… and for that day when black will not be asked to get back, brown can...”
– Rev. Lowry.
I didn’t know if I was allowed laugh at this or not.
Remember when JFK said "the torch has been passed...
alexbalk:
That’s gotta be how Bush just felt when Obama told the world that America is ready to lead once more.
WatchRicky Gervais is a funny mofo.
(via Office Tally)
Metropolitan Mondays - Can You Believe They Had... →
In an effort to share with everyone my favorite thing about Mondays - the New York Times Metropolitan Diary - I’ve started a feature: Metropolitan Mondays. I’ll post my favorite diary entry from that day every week. Click here for last week’s diary.
To fully capture the essence of this feature, I encourage you to read these entries as I do, with a faux-British accent.
Dear Diary:
Overheard in...
Schedule of Events for Inauguration Day
This is more for my benefit than anyone else’s. No offense.
» 8:25 a.m.: Obamas leave Blair House for prayer service at St. John’s Episcopal Church
» 8:35 a.m.: Prayer service
» 9:45 a.m.: Church service ends; Obamas depart for the White House
» 10:05 a.m.: Obamas arrive at White House for coffee with the Bushes
» 11 a.m.: Motorcade departs for the Capitol
» 11:30 a.m.: Bushes...
Sundance Photo Booth - The Cast of 'Mystery Team' →
Love them. Yay, UCB!
“Sometimes I’ll start a sentence, and I don’t even know where...”
– Michael Scott, in response to David Wallace’s questions “Why is your branch doing so well? What are you doing right?”:
David, here it is. My philosophy is basically this, and this is something that I live by. And I always have. And I always will. Don’t ever, for any reason,...
WatchI’m glad someone brought to life exactly what I was thinking when I read Wuthering Heights. (Thanks Matt!)
(via Elephant Larry)
On Sunday I went with my family to the New York Botanical Gardens for the last day of their train show. My 2-1/2 year old nephew is really into trains, plus I’ve really been wanting to meet Sir Topham Hatt (who’s original name, I’ve discovered, was ‘The Fat Controller,’ which I think is amazing).
I had to be on the UES at 630 to babysit for another family, so we left...
“The days when you could waltz out of Harvard Business School and go to work on...”
– Bethany McLean, Vanity Fair (from Thursday’s Daily Show)
“It’s only a free market when the market is going in your favor. As soon as...”
– Bethany McLean, Vanity Fair (from Thursday’s Daily Show)
Matthew Tobey: is this the best plane crash ever or what?
Max Silvestri: yeah!!!
Max Silvestri: all plane crashes should have no victims
Max Silvestri: there are so many plane crash jokes we usually have to wait years to make
“‘I can’t wait to strap that fake hand back on — wait, which guy did...”
– Will Arnett, on reuniting with his costars for an Arrested Development movie.
(via EW.com)